Handling rejection is one of the most difficult things for anyone to handle. For someone with ADD and ADHD, this becomes something we get used to and even more unfortunately begin to expect. It still doesn’t make it feel right, it is just something we deal with way too often.
With the above being said, it isn’t fair to say that this rejection doesn’t come from an action or misstep. Way too often we don’t learn from our mistakes and continue to have the same concerns come up on a regular basis. Just because we are genuinely remorseful when we lose our temper or say or do the wrong thing does not mean the other person will forgive that action. Remember, just because you apologize does not mean the other person is going to accept it.
Many of my clients suggest a change of scenery or a fresh start will solve his or her problems. But what he or she fails to recognize is that without a change in the behavior, the same issues will still arise. Do people reject you because of what you say? How you say it? Or your general behavior? These things follow you even if there’s new players on the stage.
Recently I tried to become friendly with someone. However, our first interaction wasn’t very positive. Even though I apologized to this person and was told it was all forgotten doesn’t mean this person wants to be my friend. My mistake was starting off on the wrong foot, and even though I was wrong and admitted as much does not mean this person will be my friend. The best lesson I can learn from this interaction is to understand what I did to make this situation bad and work through improving in the future.
It is important that you take a personal inventory of your strengths and concerns. Use this to better communicate with people. If there’s someone you’re close with, ask him or her for advice on your behaviors. And be prepared to hear what he or she has to say. Sometimes, the worst tasting medicine produces the best results.
For more information on my ADD, ADHD and Executive Functioning coaching, please visit www.adhdefcoach.com. In addition to working with clients in-person, I also work with clients all over the United States and World online, please visit www.onlineadhdcoach.com for more information. To learn more about my other services, please visit www.carrolleducationalgroup.com & www.iepexperts.com. I can be found on Twitter at ADHDGuru. You can also find me on Facebook, Google Plus and Tumblr. Feel free to email me at firstname.lastname@example.org or call 877.398.ADHD (2343) with any additional questions.