Many of the individuals I work with will lie. While some of the lies aren’t hurtful, thes are still lies. It usually involves responsibility or getting out of a situation, but the facts don’t line up with the story.
Why is this you might ask? Let’s start at the beginning. Having ADD and ADHD is a challenge. We’re dealing with a lot of personal, professional and academic struggles. It impacts our lives and there’s times when we feel that there are few options, so lying seems to be our best option. It provides instant gratification to a situation that can become worse. What we fail to realize that it will lead to much bigger and worse consequences down the road. Think of it as us ADD/ADHD folks using lies like credit cards and not realizing that there’s a bill at the end of the month.
Of course, when this bill arrives, we want to immediately file for bankruptcy. But some tough love and accountability are the best ways to ensure a successful life-lesson. I usually like to help my clients on taking ownership of the lies, identifying why he/she lied and identifying solutions moving forward. I do not like to focus on the past except to learn from mistakes. Most of my clients aren’t very happy about this, but it is the reality of life. It’s better to learn from a mistake instead of making the same one consistently.
I advise the families of my clients to keep a journal of lies. Instead of trying to deal with it in the moment, track these over time. The individual will see how the long-term consequences of lying adds up to bigger problems down the road. Touching the hot stove works.
For more helpful tips an suggestions, please check out my ADHD Guru podcast on iTunes, Google Play, Stitcher or TuneIn Radio. You can also find me on Twitter (@adhdguru) and Instagram (@adhdguru). Feel free to email me at firstname.lastname@example.org or call 877.398.ADHD (2343) with any additional questions.