People with ADD and ADHD love getting the last word in during a disagreement. It is in our DNA. This can escalate situations to a point of no return. Many of my clients have difficulty with this concept, but my client Stacy takes it to new heights.
She’s at a prominent high school in Chicago and will engage in every negative situation where it causes her to shut down. Plus, she almost creates confrontational situations…shooting first and asking questions later. It’s as if she’s always looking for a fight.
I’ve been working with her on picking and choosing her moments. As she needs to learn, we only have so much bandwidth and need to not get engaged in everything. It’s us that loses at the end of the day when we fight every battle. It took me many years to recognize this fact.
Stacy has been getting better and actually takes pride in her avoiding situations. The key is to pick and choose how we react to certain situations. If you treat every moment and issue like it’s a big deal, you’ll burn out quite quickly. It is important to think through things before reacting. While this seems like common sense, for someone with ADD/ADHD, it is not as easy as it seems. That is why I recommend the Internal Pause Button. It helps us to think through something before reacting.
For more information on my ADD, ADHD and Executive Functioning coaching, please visit www.adhdefcoach.com. In addition to working with clients in-person, I also work with clients all over the United States and World online, please visit www.onlineadhdcoach.com for more information. To learn more about my other services, please visit www.carrolleducationalgroup.com & www.iepexperts.com. I can be found on Twitter at ADHDGuru. You can also find me on Facebook, Google Plus and Tumblr. Feel free to email me at firstname.lastname@example.org or call 877.398.ADHD (2343) with any additional questions.